He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
