Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
