i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
