I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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