Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
