On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
