I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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