dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
