i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize