Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
