even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I think my moral compass just broke
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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