ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
