Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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