i just google imaged poop.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
