i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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