We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Randomize
