She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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