you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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