would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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