My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
