return my video game
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
my nose is crying tears of wow.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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