I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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