I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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