Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
