either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
