U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
