actually, I'm a sock model
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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