How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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