exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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