Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
