We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
