i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
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