i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
