I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
