gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Found your dick twin last night
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
