These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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