Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize