mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
