I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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