You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
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