I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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