I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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