whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
