a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
