my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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