I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
