He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
