so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
