I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
