i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
